It is a beautiful Autumn morning and what I really want is to go for a walk... but I must stay close to the phone. I must wait to hear from NYC. I must wait wait wait wait wait to be told when I can start. Come to think of it, cancer patients do a lot of waiting. For the last two months I have been basically waiting. I should have bought an around-the-world plane ticket...

In the beginning of August I asked my Health Insurance for an authorization to allow me to start the R7112 clinical trial at MSKCC, a hospital outside my network. This trial from Hoffmann-La Roche is only offered in 3 states: Colorado, Texas and New York. I confess that I did not have a lot of faith in my HMO. I was basically waiting to hear a NO. Once I heard a NO I would appeal. With my cancer curriculum I thought it would be easy to show the health insurance that they will benefit if I find a treatment that works... and so I continued to wait for the negative answer in order to appeal. I waited all of August and all of September.

When I gave up waiting to hear from my insurance, as I was ready to start STA 9090 at Dana-Farber, E. from my primary care physician called.

"Elsa they said YES you are all set to start the trial in NY."
"MY insurance said they would cover the costs?"
"YES."

Coincidently at the same time the oncologist from Sloan called to let me know that there was an opening in the study... (yes we also wait for a spot on the trials)

I told her I was ready to start immediately, my insurance had said YES.

You might ask why I am still waiting, why I am still at home. Why haven´t I packed? . Why am I still gardening and thinking of walks?

That will be the next post. Right now I am going to take a walk and forget the phone.

Now can I convince you to come for some tea?

lemon verbena

It is that time of the year

... when I want to bring the garden inside.
Obrigada Zé

lemongrass, thai basil and parsley

"Now the flames they followed Joan of Arc..."

Encontrei. Agora so estou à espera que o Rui escreva a carta de recomendaçao!

I found the place where I want to stay in New York City. It is a nunnery called Jeanne D´Arc. My friend Rui, who knows me since I was 10 years old, says that they will not accept me there ;).

My long and "bery" sweet break (since surgery in June) is coming to an end. I spent the Summer preparing my body for the upcoming combat (with a balanced diet, exercise and relaxation) and now I am ready to return to the battlefield (this time in NYC). The Hope is that R7112, my new weapon, will target the MDM2, and get my wild P53 to work and kill my cancer cells.

:))) this is how I understand the Nutlin-MDM2-p53 diagrams my oncologists, Dr. Jeffrey Morgan and Dr. Geoffrey Shapiro, patiently drew and explained to me.

useful links

when you have cancer treatment far from home:

New York City
Miracle House (you need a caregiver staying with you and book a month in advance)
ACS-Hope Lodge, Jerome L. Greene (you must be referred by your medical center's social worker)
Sloan-Kettering Accomodations (more expensive than the hotels I can find on Hotwire)
Joe's House Lodging Guide for MSKCC

Boston
Hospitality Homes
AstraZeneca Hope Lodge (opening November 2008)

Across USA
National Association of Hospital Hospitality Houses Inc.
Joe's House
American Cancer Society Hope Lodges
for children: Ronald McDonald House

for me this is poetry

Shapirogram


Morgangram

first (50) days

Para ti Maya.
For Maya, who taught me to live
one hour at a time.



(Everyone knows that Maya is really spoiled by all of us...
this video, of her first 50 days, might reveal why we just can't help it).