Sunday, February 14, 2010



It's that time of the month- again! I just swallowed 0.25mg of Lorazepam, one tablet of Kytril and 2mg of Decadron (steroids). The Lorazepam is already making me sleepy. Now I am staring at the 1.270mg of R7112 that I have to swallow. I usually swallow all the pills at the same time (one of 250 mg, two of 10mg and two of 500mg). Yes, all of them at once so I don't change my mind.

I am glad that I was allowed to stay on the study. It is still the best drug I can be on. The fact that some tumors shrank is fantastic. I was a bit disappointed with the scan results on Friday because I dared to dream that there would be no growth at all...

Anyway today is an auspicious day to start attacking the monster again. It is the first day of the Year of the Tiger. According to the Chinese it is a sign of bravery.

I wish you all a Happy Lunar Year 恭喜發財 新年快樂 Kung Hei Fat Choi

... and muito Samba and lots of dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine since it is also Carnaval and Valentine's day.

OK I better stop procrastinating and swallow my chemo pills.

Friday, February 12, 2010

One more cycle coming up

Elsa is upset about the results today. It seems the tumors are beginning to increase, although it is hard to tell, because they are hard to read. The radiologist read the scan and classified the situation as stable, but there are some readings showing the tumors to be bigger and some where the tumors are smaller. It's a mess.

In any case, she is going on with the treatment. She starts the next cycle on Sunday.

OK. She is not upset anymore. She was just mad because I did not give her a hug or say anything. But I'm going to do that now, so I think that will fix things.

Ok. She is smiling again.

It's just frustrating to try so hard and still have so much uncertainty. It's a tough disease, that's for sure.

Now we are waiting for the drugs for the next cycle. We are going to Pret-a-Manger to have a treat before picking up the medication and heading home in that most "wonderful" Connecticut traffic. I can just imagine it.

Oh! But I got the Fast Lane/EZ Pass device now, so we do not have to wait to pay tolls.

At the waiting lobby

Stepping out of the elevator means 45 minutes to drink the Barium Smoothie. It does not go smoothly though. It is a 45 minute torture. This time they only have banana flavored smoothie. My least prefered flavor. That adds extra time to the 45 minutes. If Einstein had had cancer he would have realized that Ct scan waiting time is part of his warpped space-time continuum.

A lady, obviously altered by Decadron rails against her child for doing childish things. I know it is the decadron, only too well, for it easly sets off a little monster in me. From normal easy going, I turn into a tight bundle of irritable energy. The lady has not learned to deal with Decadron or perhaps she just doesn't know its effects yet. So the kid now sits sad and morose on the couch. he is just six or seven years old.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Dear friends

I have been away because Farmville has been taking all of my time. Hopefully I'll be back soon after I cure myself. I have joined FAA (Farmville Addicts Anonymous).

Hello my name is Elsa and I am a Farmvohollic.


Sorry I have to go now, there is a pink calf on top of my dairy barn.

Love,
Elsa